Financial Well-Being: From Financial Stress to Intentional Choice

Guest post by Jim Lindsay, Financial Mindset Coaching

Financial well-being means different things to different people. For one person, it may mean paying the monthly bills without worry. For another, it may mean eliminating debt, building an emergency fund, purchasing a home, preparing for retirement, or simply feeling more confident when making financial decisions.

Regardless of how we define it, money affects far more than our bank accounts.

According to a BetterHelp article citing the American Heart Association, 82% of adults report feeling stressed about money. Motley Fool Money’s 2024 Financial Stress, Anxiety and Mental Health Survey also found that more than half of respondents experienced financial stress or anxiety at least three days each week.

Although statistics like these may feel alarming, they also remind us that financial stress is common—and that we do not have to remain powerless in our relationship with money.

It has been said that money is a wonderful servant but a terrible master. The first step toward becoming the master of our finances is developing an honest understanding of where we are today.

Awareness Before Action

Understanding your income and expenses creates awareness of your saving and spending habits. That awareness may feel uncomfortable at first, but it allows you to determine whether your financial choices are intentional and goal-focused or driven by unconscious habits and “money leaks.”

Many clients tell me they do not have a budget or savings plan. Some fear that they will be unable to create or maintain one. Others suspect the news will be bad and would simply rather not know.

When clients tell me they are afraid to look at their finances, I am reminded of a line from Byron Katie’s book Loving What Is:

“Reality is always kinder than the stories we tell about it.”

Avoiding our financial reality rarely makes it better. In fact, uncertainty often creates more fear than the facts themselves. Once we understand where we are today, we can begin setting achievable goals and working toward becoming a stronger financial version of ourselves.

Progress may not always be easy, but it is frequently more achievable than we originally imagined.

Create a Weekly Money Habit

One of the easiest ways to understand your spending habits is to review your recent financial activity.

I encourage clients to establish a brief weekly money review—perhaps every Sunday evening. Once this becomes a habit, the process typically takes only 10 to 15 minutes.

During your review:

List all sources of income.
Record the amount you saved.
Review checking and debit-card transactions.
Examine every credit card balance and recent charge.
Identify upcoming bills and unusual expenses.
Notice spending patterns without criticizing yourself.

Tracking your saving and spending allows you to recognize what you are already doing well and identify areas you may want to improve.

Notice that I listed saving before spending.

Many people plan to save whatever remains after paying their bills and completing their spending. Unfortunately, that approach often results in little or nothing being saved. Instead, consider determining what you can realistically set aside from each paycheck and treating that amount as part of your financial plan.

It does not have to be a large amount. Consistency is more important than perfection.

Your Budget Is a Financial GPS

Some people hear the word budget and immediately think of restriction, deprivation, or punishment. A flexible and realistic budget is not intended to prevent you from enjoying your life. It helps you decide how you want to use your money.

Think of a budget as a map or GPS for your finances.

When you miss a turn while driving, your GPS does not shame you or declare that the trip has failed. It recalculates and helps you return to your route.

Your budget can serve the same purpose.

Life will happen. Cars will need repairs. Medical expenses will arise. Home appliances will stop working at inconvenient times. A month that does not go according to plan does not mean you have failed. Your budget can help you adjust, recalculate, and continue moving toward your destination.

Look for Your Money Leaks

Small, repeated purchases can become significant expenses over time.

For example, a $3.50 coffee purchased five days a week for 50 weeks totals $875 a year. There is nothing inherently wrong with buying coffee. The important question is whether that purchase is intentional and whether it aligns with your priorities.

Would you rather continue buying the coffee, or could some of that money help you pay down a credit card, build an emergency fund, take a family vacation, or accomplish another meaningful goal?

This exercise is not about guilt or shame. It is about awareness and choice.

Recurring charges are another helpful place to look. Are you using every streaming service you pay for? Do you still need each subscription? Are you regularly using the gym membership you opened two years ago?

Individually, these charges may appear insignificant. Collectively, they may be quietly directing money away from the things that matter most to you.

Explore Your Money Story

As you examine your saving and spending habits, it may also be helpful to examine your thoughts and beliefs about money.

Our earliest money lessons seldom come from financial courses or textbooks. They come from what we heard, observed, and experienced growing up.

Some people were taught—directly or indirectly—that money was dirty, selfish, scarce, or something “good people” should not desire. Others heard statements such as:

“The rich get richer, and the poor get poorer.”
“Money doesn’t grow on trees.”
“People like us will never have money.”
“You have to work yourself to death to get ahead.”
“Wanting more money makes you greedy.”

For some families, holidays, birthdays, vacations, and other special events were overshadowed by arguments about money. These experiences can form beliefs that continue influencing us long after childhood.

A belief that once seemed true to a young child may be completely inaccurate for that child as an adult.

This raises several important questions:

What did you learn about money growing up?
How was money discussed in your home?
What did you observe about saving, spending, debt, work, and wealth?
Which of those beliefs still influence you today?
Are those beliefs accurate?
Are they helping you create the life you want?

Unexamined beliefs can influence how much we save, how quickly we spend, the financial opportunities we pursue, and even whether we believe we deserve financial success.

Financial Well-Being Is More Than Income

In The Psychology of Money, Morgan Housel shares the story of Ronald Read, a gas-station attendant, mechanic, and later a part-time janitor at JCPenney.

Read lived modestly and quietly invested in established companies over many years. When he died in 2014 at age 92, his estate was worth nearly $8 million. He left approximately $4.8 million to a local hospital, $1.2 million to a library, and the remainder primarily to family members, friends, and caregivers.

Read did not accumulate wealth through a high-profile career or an unusually large salary. His financial results grew from his habits, patience, lifestyle, and long-term decisions.

His story illustrates an important lesson: Financial well-being is not determined solely by how much we earn. It is also shaped by what we believe, how we behave, what we retain, and the choices we repeat over time.

People with high incomes can experience serious financial difficulties, while people with more modest incomes can gradually build security and wealth. Income matters, but behavior and beliefs also play critical roles.

Moving from Effect to Cause

When we avoid looking at our finances, react automatically to our emotions, or allow old beliefs to direct our choices, we are often living at the effect of our financial circumstances.

Moving toward being the cause does not mean that we can control everything. Inflation, unexpected expenses, job changes, health challenges, and family responsibilities are real. Being at the cause means recognizing where we still have choices and taking responsibility for those choices.

We can choose to review our finances.

We can choose to question an old belief.

We can choose to save a manageable amount.

We can choose to pause before making an unplanned purchase.

We can choose to ask for help when we need it.

Financial well-being is rarely created through one dramatic decision. It is usually built through small, intentional choices practiced consistently.

Begin with One Word

One of my favorite activities when co-facilitating a financial well-being workshop for a global nonprofit is to ask participants this question:

“When I say the word money, what is the first word that comes to mind?”

Do not search for the perfect response. Pay attention to the first word that appears.

Is it freedom? Stress? Security? Fear? Opportunity? Scarcity? Conflict? Possibility?

Write down your word and spend a few minutes journaling about it:

Why might this be my first association with money?
Where did I learn to view money this way?
How has this belief influenced my financial choices?
Is this the relationship I want to continue having with money?
What word would I like to associate with money in the future?

Approach the exercise with curiosity rather than judgment. Your answer is not good or bad. It is information—and information creates awareness.

Your Next Intentional Step

Financial well-being does not require knowing every answer or correcting every financial issue today. It begins with being willing to look honestly at where you are, understand the beliefs and habits that helped bring you there, and choose one manageable step forward.

Create a simple budget. Review your spending once a week. Begin saving a realistic amount from each paycheck. Cancel one recurring charge you no longer value. Question one childhood belief about money that may no longer be true.

You do not have to transform your entire financial life overnight.

You simply have to become a little more conscious and intentional with your next choice.

Sources

BetterHelp, “Financial Stress Statistics: What the Data Says About Money and Stress.”
Motley Fool Money, “Financial Stress, Anxiety and Mental Health Survey.”
Morgan Housel, The Psychology of Money: Timeless Lessons on Wealth, Greed, and Happiness. Harriman House, 2020.

About the Author

James “Jim” F. Lindsay, PCC, CPC, CLDS, is a professional coach, trainer, and workshop facilitator who helps individuals develop greater awareness of the beliefs and habits influencing their personal, professional, and financial lives. His coaching emphasizes intentional choice, practical action, accountability, and sustainable behavioral change.

This article is intended for educational purposes and does not constitute individualized financial, investment, tax, or legal advice.